Antlers blog - The memories and thoughts of a gay man in the city

TGIF!

2006-02-10T19:09:00.000-08:00

Whew, im so glad that i made it to friday!
Well its been quite a week. Works sucks.

I just want to say that my co-worker is a jerk. No offense or anything. But he is a complete and utter dick-head.

Anyways, enough time spent on him, lets talk about me.

Last night my bf left me to go drink with his college friend, Brandon. I like Brandon alot. It just seems that everytime him and Brandon go out, Brandon keeps bringing more my bf more and more drinks and he comes home throwing up on my sheets. Its not particularly attractive.

I told my bf that he should limit himself to 3-4 drinks especially on a weekday.

Is that cruel? I understand having a drink to unwind, but coming home sick and throwing up all over the place and then making me clean it up just doesnt seem fair.

Another note, tomorrow my bf is getting his 8 cavities fixed. Ouch. I hate going to the dentist, but some twisted part of me is glad that he is going to the dentist. Just to see him squirm a bit makes me laugh.

My television has been acting up recently and has been not displaying the picture properly. Anyone willing to buy this cute gay man a TV or a drink?

Anyways, other then that my wknd is pretty free. Although i think some ex-coworkers want to hang out. Im not sure yet.

In any case, thats all folks, will post some more thoughts later this wknd.
Love ya,
Phil

Monday as a drinking night?

2006-02-07T19:14:00.000-08:00

How in the world do people go out to drink on a monday night? Its amazing to me.
I went out last nite to starlight, a bar in downtown east side nyc. They had happy hour so my bf and i decided to swing by.

Bad idea, one glass of red wine, clementini, 2 gin tonics, and an ameretto sour later, i was stumbling home.

How do people do it? I mean i love going out and had a blast, but i get me to a happy hour and ill start drinking way beyond my limit.

Sometimes i dont know if its the bargain hunter in me talking, but if i see happy hour, i think discount, and when i think discount, i start calculating how much money i am saving on each drink. Pretty pathetic right?

Well today was just a plain old tuesday. I went to work feeling like crap and then had to deal with arseholes. Blah blah blah.

The highlight of my day was going home and cuddling with a slice of flan. Oh flan, you are so creamy and delicious. You make my day so much better.

Oh and another thing, i am so happy that Hot Toddy emailed and commented on this blog. He is a sweetheart and oh so funny. I am glad to have emailed him and hopefully itll be nice to have a penpal. He really brightened up my day. Sorta like meeting a celebrity!!

In any case, before i start gushing and people think im absolutely looney, i am going to get a kiss from my bf and start hitting the sack.

Maybe if i play my cards right, ill get some. Wish me luck!

-Phil

Rice - Gay Azn Bois, why!?

2006-02-05T15:01:00.000-08:00

2 posts in a row. My thoughts are everywhere today.

You know what is interesting? Why do gay asian men (GAM) want to describe themselves as gay azn bois?

I mean i know GAM that describe themselves on their blog as azn bois. What the fuck is an azn boi? Im all for creating a voice and identity in the gay asian community, but i dont really think this description of boi is flatterying to me or any other asian for that matter at all.

Ive been told that GAM can say that they are boi's forever. I mean c'mon. when youre over 21 youre not a boi anymore. Lets not perpetuate the misconeption of the never aging, asian waif. I am an asian man. I am 26 year old. I do not need to be described as a boi. I find it degrading. I am proud to be a man living and loving a man. I want to spit on other asian men that call themselves bois.

To me the azn boi, is telling the world that asian men are not real men. No matter what age we are and how much money we make we are describing ourselves as less then real men. Maybe every race in the gay community has their own name for their own race. But i havent heard of any. Maybe because i am asian i hear all these names to describe us. I really hate it.

To all you asian gay men that describe yourselves as bois. I dont care what age you are. You are not a boi. You are either a boy or a man. Why seperate and isolate yourself? In a community where physical appearance counts first do we really need to seperate ourselves so much?

To all men that have a fetish on asian men, i really hope you dont refer to us as bois. I mean god bless you for thinking that asian is sexy and hot, but c',mon, one day that boi wont be a boi anymore and will be an asian man with thinning hair. I dont care how many times asians tell you we dont age. We do. Maybe more gracefully, but we do.

I dont know why im ranting about this subject. But i know asian men that think this way, and i just want to tell you that in order for you to find happiness, you need to embrace who and what you are. You are a man, you are powerful, and you should never let anyone else tell you otherwise.

-Phil

another wknd flies by - neighbors having sex!

2006-02-05T14:37:00.000-08:00

Another wknd just flew by. I dont believe it. Today John and i went walking around the village and we happened on the most fantastic place.
A studio apt was for sale that was amazing! It had 2 elevators and a L shaped studio. Exactly what i wanted.

Too bad it was out of our price range.
We'll have to make more money in the future.

Its interesting how money for us just seems to dissapear. Combined we both make pretty decent salaries, but we always seem to be in debt. Does anyone else have this problem?

Ah - the price of a fabulous gay life-style is tough. Actually its not so fabulous. I have barely bought anythign for myself in the past two years.

In any case, tomorrow is another day of work and i cant stand it. I really hate working. I just want to win the lottery.

Lets see, what happened of interest this past week? Well John and i went to the dentist yesterday and found out that he had eight, thats right folks, EIGHT cavities. He needs to brush his teeth!!!

In all honesty, he hasnt been to the dentist in quite some time so i guess its forgivable.
But readers, now you KNOW who has the stinky breath in the relationship :)

So i just wanted to let everyone know that i live in a sex-filled building. Not including my romps with my sexy bf, everyone seems to be having sex here. My next door neighbor, a male model, apparently has sex all the time. And also to the other side of my apt, another male waiter has sex all the time! How do I know this? My bf seems to be able to pick up the moans and groans from our lust-filled neighbors. When i ask him to clean up, he cant hear a thing. But he can hear everything that is our neighbors are doing. Go figure.

I really dont know how i feel about my bf reading this blog. Its weird, cuz sometimes i want to pour out my feelings on here, but i dont know if i should. But honestly, i really dont have much to hide from him. I love him, i think he is sexy, and he is the one for me.

Back to when we were thinking about buying the apartment today, he said it was a major committment. I agree with him, and the commitment is what i want. Im ready to spend the rest of my life with him.

Sappy right?

I actually have asked a few friends what they thought of our PDA. I asked them if its nauseating to them. A few of them have replied, "a little." WTF??

But then i put myself in their shoes, and i realize i would be a little grossed out too.

Anyways, besides the apartment this week nothing of note.

Oh oh oh! Im going to take a week off next month, but its not really a vacation as im going to be studying for my stupid series 7. These exams are the devil!!!

Thanks for reading,
Phil

oh bloggy!

2006-02-05T14:32:00.000-08:00

oh Bloggy, why do you irritate me? i just spent the last 30 minutes trying to change the template to my blog and it doesnt work. I chose scribe and when i preview my blog its works fine, but when i actually bring up my webpage it shows my stupid ass polka dot template.

Fuck!

Took some time off today

2006-01-31T15:27:00.000-08:00

This past sunday was chinese new years. I had a great time. My bf john and i went home to my moms and he spent the night. The next morning we went to temple in chinatown and waited in line for 2 plus hours to get in and worship.
We all got yellow medallions with a picture of a buddha on it. I remember last year was a purple one with etchings of goon-yum.

After being at the temple, we went for vegetarian foods at one of my favorite vegetarion restaurants, Gobo. It was delicious!

John left after Gobo and my mother and my sister michele went to see Nanny Mcphee. After that we went to Mike Jordan's steakhouse. It was sisters and moms first time and they like it. My sister ordered the regular rib-eye which was delicious, and my mother ordered the buffalo rib-eye which was more expensive but really really chewy. The taste of the meat was excellent but it was just too chewy for my liking.

That night i spent that night at my mothers house and next morning we had dimsum with auntie candy, and the sheks. Afterwards we went to Long Island so that i could see the sheks new place of residence. Their house is SO HUGE. Its so suburban though. Like there is a little fountain in the middle of their courtyard and the housed surround the fountain. Its kinda of gross and cute at the same time.

I love their OSIM brand massage chair that they bought for 3000 dollars!!!

Anyways, what i really liked about the house was that when i travelled from the first to second floor i saw many pictures of them and their kids. What interested me most was the fact that there was more pictures of them then their kids. I thought that was so sweet.
I told John about this and said that that is what i want, and he just kind of laughed. Oh well.

In any case, after we did that we went back into queens and did some apartment shopping. I really like the apartment behind the library in elmhurst. I either want to own/rent a place there, but my bf is opposed to living anywhere but the city. Ill have to persuade him otherwise.

I took today off to rest and relax, and im doing that but i seriously miss my bf.

Thanks for reading,
Phil

hello

2005-03-23T18:00:00.000-08:00

hi this is a test

New update: i just reviewed my first post and its kind of lame.

I just wanted to write down a little about some stuff on my mind. I thought this blog would serve the purpose of collecting my thoughts and also to record the on-goings of my life.

Im currently 26, will turn 27 in 4 months. Unbelievable. I cant believe im entering my late 20's. But to tell you the truth, every year has gotten better for me. So i looks forward to stuff getting better!

I am now dating a very fine young man named John. We met shortly after his 22nd bday. I was 24. We were both very young. He wanted to ravage me on the first night and i said no. He kept asking me to go back to his apt for "coffee". I think if i slept with him the first night our relationship could have continued but i dont think i would have been very proud of it. I hate the stereotypical slutty gay man. I surely am not! Well maybe sometimes :) But only with my bf.

I work for an investment bank in midtown and i hate it. I hate my co-workers. Thank god they are paying me well.

Anyways enough writing for now. Peace
PHil